Forecast

bus carrying the students

Following the orgy bus fiasco brings back memories of boarding school while having a tower of beer, priorities were straight forward. Being in that uniform it was over and over again drilled in my head that bearing the uniform colors and logo was of the uttermost of importance ( don't be fooled by the word uttermost,we beat patch in a rugby finals when the word patch meant a formidable side who were Prescott Cup  and National champions, now its laiser hill..whhhaaaatt...

As I digress, sipping a pint from a tower, I recall during my not so late days, waking up getting to breakfast just to draw some tea from such a tower was an everyday struggle/challenge. Which if not a senior would make your day or break it ( pia ulughya na chai unajua tu). What am trying to highlight is that.....that tea was the ish but everyone gets their time to drink peacefully with age, being as it may same applies to wanting to grow up and do grown up stuff......shiet nooo an orgy isn't grown up stuff considering I am yet to participate in a sexual encounter totalling more than two persons, me being one in that equation & on occasion just me.

I know its cold but what happened to the days when we waited to get in those magical blanket of a boarding school bed( for unexplained reasons, with a sheet shiet thick mattress though that sleep was too heavy)instead of an orgy or sex.

 The cold would warranty one to avalanche themselves with the sheets & blanket considering we don't have snow ( hence the forecast title). Though recently back in Nairobi women have a wave. Not (heat wave) a wave of makeup. Alot of it. I think goosebumps (the book as well) are a think of the past just like a nokia 3310 ( best I could come up with that was old & can be grasped by multiple generations at the same time, now that was an educative wave of sorts.
But this make up masks, its sorta confusing. I know Beyonce puts on a boat load but I personally haven't seen her up close. For good reason. So when y'all applying makeup like you live under the lens, it puzzles me. The women now seem to be a sort of colour scheme. Face hands and legs don't not really align.

On aligning there also the inverted Nike sign that pass for eyebrows. Now they come with colours to add salt the bigger they are the seemingly the better. This brought again by those soaps with Latina girls pulling them off....African not . How many manly hours ( no the word man should be revoked from such a phrase because I am fairly certain we don't take as much time to do grooming.
Let me not venture to hair because they might pull them out throw them at me and set me on fire.  Though when you see a woman having done the extremities of the above màn made features.....nothing can be real on her. (Nicki) can pull it off because she lives under a lens as well but not to be an example or role model. Speaking of models ...if they are coming in such packaged forms. I call fraud. They might be taking the hawkers word too strongly when they are calling out 'hii ndio ya camera.' Well the naked eye beats a camera lens 10 fold. Don't believe everything you hear ladies.You are very beautiful women though Nairobi hands down.
 Cheers blogsphere.

East - West Home is Best

Since getting back to Nairobi & inbetween jobs ('not employed speak' which was of my own doing) In attempts to moving on to richer pastures which I am yet to find). I have acquired some added skill set on my time back in addition to my time away.
I got back recently and realized how it was and nice the tropic can be,the pearl of Africa even when wet was always warm for some reason. Due to my many injures on the grid iron( rugby pitch) when I got back I realized am home by the fact that my knee bones would start to ache when the rain is almost (being a guy from the community which had renown weather men /women might have a hand in this or not.Right now its such a down pour in just a sudden change of wind. Cleansing feeling washing away a lot of dust and nice air and aroma but the traffic my gosh.
When I got back home...having not tarmac road, I found the road to our house composing of mostly cotton soil barely there and replaced with a pool of dark dirty water mixed with sewage and carefully placed rocks on intervals serving as a path to walk on. Just one stumble is a dip in the dirt infested water and slimy mud. Takes a certain skill set to man-oeuvre over such making me some what an expert if I am ever in a dilemma of a hiking trip through the jungle or walking through a mine field full of explosive. ( Don't shrug its a balancing act to preserve ones look and neatness and considering I have been away for quite a while, meeting with up with dear friends and fores I have to look at-least my semi best...so the balancing walk is crucial).

Speaking of land mines, explosives and all the security beef up all over has me feeling as if in a military ruled country. Sort of a dejavu to Uganda but always found home to be utopia for me. If you don't find home safe, where can someone ever feel safe.
Patience is a virtue and a skill set. Coming from the boda boda capital, here with the organised public transport and people having bought cars of the shelf in plenty and better road (bypass and whatnot-overlapping roads) you would think that the flow of traffic and accidents would be at a low. Shock on me as I was at a stage for over 2 hours and when I finally boarded a matatu ( tricked out by the way- the colors and designs make the town so vibrant and pleasant).

I stayed in traffic for over 3 hrs. A distance which on a normal day would take 45min at most putting in account the weather and many other factors.
To my surprise the alcoblow thing, guys are making friends of sober buddies and more drivers are on employment. Bummer is that they cant really hang out with the boss and drink. Maybe overtime and hardship allowance is the way to go.
But east west home is best. This free thinking nation of ours is way way ahead & blessed in more ways than one. The personality's and work ethic, doesn't surprise me that the pearl of Africa heavily depends on our working force which is quite bold of them.
Kenya inspires me for example. Its been quite a while since I wrote something. I might be rusty but maybe if I continue, I will get back to my entertaining self and be BAKE awards nominee. The betterment of myself is eminent. I just hope you will have me back blogsphere.

COMING OF AGE,ALCOHOLIC AGE

When you are a high functioning alcoholic and worst of all can sustain your habit it becomes quite the adventure everytime the opportunity arises. Since becoming an earning member of society the other dilemmas that arise is whether I go out how long may I drink and be asleep & still get to work or either if you can get to work/hustle at all & have a productive one. In some recent past the only problem was where & how can you get the dime to have a full night out to the break of dawn if the pocket & lack of a 'takeaway' ( lets face it, if you get that takeaway on those one off's situation with a vacant crib room , that night cant wait for  the morning finding  you still struggling to down a bottle or dancing in the club. TakeAway on the go.)
If the finances and crew are in agreement a Thursday all through to the Sunday was a prime night to drink meet up with same old people or the regulars. Hell even Monday reggae night was a reason to drink. Sleep all day or probably a lecture or two during the day. Having to hand in that assignment in time was the most pressing bit & thanx to google & a simple smart phone that can be an hour tops work of research & an above average paper.
Thats a recent past. In the now, the today is benefing from those sleepless nights. ( of course not the sleepless nights of reading but drinking) having had time to siphon out which drink works for your system,which drink makes you spill your guts out unapologetically( zappa all colors). The drink that makes you ALWAYS have a pirate face each time you take a shot 'Aaar Maighty' ( Myers Rum not the best for first impressions esp if the significant other 'most of them takeaway' is a drunkard) that drink or mixology of drinks that make you wake up looking like a homeless hobo without any chance of a quick recovery but takes a full day just to even get out of bed( in  my journals that mixing a crate of beer, the myers rum plus the zappa and everything else probably chemical X' used to make the power puff girls. Am not saying am rhino (having no natural predator to hunt them other than humans but I can hold my own whenever wherever. In the before days, I had friends and family to dip my in the fountain immortality ( references to Troy just in the scenerio was ALOT of alcohol). The fountain being a metaphor to alcohol. Most of us survived by the fact our we didn't get emersed completely.
I have fell before but very few times. A concision of drinks. Though its staggering (see what I did there) its staggering how much you get to see when you are the last man standing.  When your drunk but not as wasted. When your always the guy seeing guys home safely,taking care of them. How hard is it to buy somebody water yet so easy to jug alcohol down their throat. Your always the guy who has the right story & guys reference you to prove that chic you were dancing was hot or just really expensive make-up. Atleast now with a phone its instant pic and ig. (Follow @Sebvistan).
Its a blessing & curse. Always the last to get to sleep, being responsible for your friends not to funk the car or scent it with their puk. Right here is when I realise alcoblow has just made a designated drivers job much more difficult.
Having to go through all that without a sip makes it more harder. Its all the responsibility without a cushion. It was much more interesting having to regulate with the addition of atleast being able to understand the drunk truthful jibberish of your drunk friends. (Drunk guys always say the truth).
A responsible mature alcoholic doesnt dip his toe in the pool unless absolutely worth it ( hot ...forgive me,absolutely hot chic.) A high functioning alcoholic already knows by the end of the night which friends he should be around with, which drink if working or having a performance of the night he should be on. Its a skills that take time to cultivate & nature. A learning curve of sorts but with drinks very curvy. Sort of like a drunk guy trying to walk a straight line. If you get my drift.
As I cant begin to apologise on how silent I have been but my trip back to the motherland however brief was the one that inspired this post. Some friends that I had the pleasure of sharing a bottle with cc. Wangai &  Edd.....yea double D.
This is just how far they would go to chase that high. Mixing vodka with chillies & letting it marinate.
Cheers blogsphere.

Culture shock

Out of all the many countries I managed to land a job in one of the most backward (yet to develop as my homeland) in all honesty. Let me first air my concern then you will be the judge.
Its funny though, when you are in a new country. .other than the greeting the first words you learn to say is...."I cant speak your language". I have said it numerous times such that now they can even deduce it from my face just by how I look at them with such desire to actually want understand while at the same time thinking of how am going to tell this person l have been listening to you so keenly but now you'll have to repeat all that in a langauge THAT I UNDERSTAND. Now imagine how many faces I used in such a conversation. Not forgetting that I pick on a few words where I momentarily go like "YaY" then its back bluh bluh bluh........
6months in and the country people are proud of their national language (not official) such that when you talk to them in English. (Yes this being the most common & basic of languages) they feel be littled. Like am trying to show that I am better than them. Fate also seemed to have a hand in this(will explain after brief regress).....but when I say a backward country. I mean its basically a military state and powers that be are weilded by a certain tribe , well know and their presence pronounced & are the privileged. Unfortunately again the level of education for the ones with buck load of money cant speak any other language apart from their own (illiterate). Which I think is high time I mention is 'Luganda' atleast for the central part. Recently learnt they dont have a formal national language as such so when in a certain region you best speak THEIR tribal language.  The tribe in power usually can speak swahili but they have their own ancestral language and most of them speak kiswahili( now my national language).
With all those facts lets this stir.......(where I regressed. Fate plays a hand here)
I have a resemblance to the tribe in power who are the minority and got into power by means of a coup, I cant speak their language and they feel be littled especially by how I talk in English. Seemingly like a poser and am in the service industry where I have to talk to people worst part of it. ...advice them.
Not that am complaining but feels like a cast in Lupita's movies ( yah had to sneak that in) somehow.
Its not easy no lie but there are some perks. Am kenyan goddamit, if lupita can get there I can sure set an example here and be a trendsetter esp with all the challenges.
The language though has just refused, hopefully I will be here long enough to learn the language. If only I was a woman, they are better at langauges. With that bid all lovely women who read this a happy womens international womens day or if its posted at a later date then hopefully you were all recognised in your own respect and appreciated deservingly.

Bachelor's Crib (me) Edition

After having to move and get my own space from my month long roommates i am in my 2nd month in & with each day growing fond of my privacy location and independence.
Though the move wasnt an easy breeze, had to sleep in an incomplete house ( under contraction) making sure to secure the space and also my former roomie was in need of his space back considering he had done me a solid by housing me & apprenticing under him.Taught me the ropes in an industry I can confidently say I have acquired some professionalism on top of my degree ( not to brag but googling research material in tertiary education is a skill too).
After being ejaculated ( yes the word is in its rightt context because it felt had been really f@#ked over sideways).
The self contained place that he helped me get so conveniently ( I know right now sounds like I was the problem but this is my blog he can defend himself on his ....oops not ). The house having a room,self contained no kitchen but at least a living room, location very close to the town and more importantly the rave hub of the city and top it all off within a compound and not and island where when I wash my cloths have to watch over them until the dry ( nasty flash back of boarding school NB havent said secondary or primary school.   ( like watching paint drying ,both boringly and painfully. (Not sure theres such a word as boringly).
While under construction had to sleep in the adjusent room without the use of the very important amenitiesof a bathroom. Showering was passport and had to hold everything in until the next day. For half a month. (Hard/soft watery. Everything was plugged in tight.)
It wasnt too bad. Now though been moved to a new branch, different locale and working hours. So on my second shift just noticed I had never woken and stayed in MY house past the break of dawn or before dusk. Am always up and out by 6 something and back home late after 7 ( this was while i was getting a lift to and from work 5 days a week, now its about public transport so times are way earlier and later.  Since got a new shift....my morning was free wokeup and saw my house in the light.
Usually on weekends my mum while living with her would pester me about dusting her house occasionally when I was free and while most of my work was looking for movies now I feel compelled to do the same thing with my house because as I write this. MY HOUSE is  getting  dusty and cobwebs. I have spiders living among my space, my private space. Its warranted that I have vampire habits being home and my house having an existing being only when its dark but those cobwebs are so many I just had to write a post.. yep yep its that bad. Other than that am late for work already too late and doing an evening shift on a rugby day.bummer
Cheers blogsphere. Any tips to rid my house of spider please share.

Valz -Love Kenyan Design.

The beauty of falling in love is non like anyi other. While in that moment, it is unmatched to any other thing. All you crave is being in someone's embrace all the time everytime. Especially if its forbidden , or something that should happen or wouldn't be approved.
Now looking at indepth, my fellow Kenyans take this love buisness to a whole other definition. They have similar stages but its done in their own design. The wanting to be in someones company embrace is so hastily done that guys move in together. ( I get that we kenyan are quick to act hence the preference tk be employed over our neighboring eastafrican community among other detail).
As I sieze to digress.They hasten by moving in together and from the go it becomes a convinient arrangement( to be clear by convinient doesnt mean someone gets a free ride unless one party is obscenely well off which hardly happen unless sugar mami/daddi situations ). The unspoken arrangement is usually well balanced with man of the house obviously shouldering most of the bills but in an African fair way. Gerrit!.
The situation is mostly hastened especially if a baby is borne in the love (ahem) and expected to be brought to the very unfair world of ours expectant with great hopes & to enjoy what it offers fully if maybe you were tazan or littldmermaid.
The 'come we stay' bit is like a test ran to a maybe future which usually doesnt come in time. Its like a verification of compatability & not just because liveability is also a majot factor. On paper, Facebook twitter among friends you might be SI unit of a relationship and be the couple that finishes each others sentences. But when its behind closed doors one of the parties might be enraged by the significant other by just the mere way how they smear toothpaste.  One is used to squeezing from the bottom the other is used to heltascelta way of things. ( it happens ).
Often than not, or is often OR not tradition is actually upheld and the guy has to go bid to marry the lady by bribing the parents & what with what not but this is also catalyzed by expectation of a bandle of joy. Even if the marriage never happens the warning is already given and if they decide to go separate ways an amicable arrangement ( somehow) is made ( not verbally ofcourse ) but things usually workout. The child will be loved.  Most importantly.
Convinient arrangement in a nutshell and everyone gets to be happy. The couple seemingly have an open relationship.  There is a kin to both parties and a pair of granddads & grandmums are created. There is love and happiness to be shared  all around.
This is a definition to a true love story and happiness embodied by Valentine's.  Kenyan style.
Cheers blogosphere. 
Happy Valz.

Marriage in a Nutshell

The series continues ......readers discretion adviced. The recent series have been drafted at an earlier stage. Miatch post alert.
Dreams are balling like a sparling,(the actual basketball) there's ups & downs but hopefully eventually there'll be a dunk. Draft thoughts....money is the universal language.
A month in & still staying as a guest in a foreign country. It didn't seem like it would be hard. The most challenge I thought I would be facing was setting myself up, a new beginning but I hadn't learnt from experience. Even if not from my own experience, I have friends,of the opposite gender whose had roommates in multiples & most of their relationships as friends didn't end well CC Waithera.
Here I thought it was just a girl thing but now, oh how wrong was I. Indifferences between people is real people. The worst part is having to see the same person day in day out. Especially waking up & seeing their face every morning. Its the first thing you have to see everyday. ( smh). This journey would be more smoother if it was someone I could be amicable with...to be honest I might be the guy with the problem & selfish. Unfortunately this is the only space that's mine & hell, I can vent & bitch as much as I like,judge me or not. Miatch posts.
A past Sunday I found myself alone in the house,I didn't even want to go explore the country or the town which I barely know, just enjoyed the self ambience and freedom of my thoughts not being interputted or scramming for the remote,just to watch music channels - get this he  didn't like hiphop, he'd rather listen to classical stuff not even lingala, & it's just not one time, its all the time.
When we are dibz on the remote, the rare occassions he wins, he would rather watch wrestling, imagine. (Gasket blowing)
I have had a good childhood, wrestling was a phase, back then it was row & so manly, now guys come pour their hearts out, f*#k. Most part of the time they are talking, correct me if am wrong but its like a telemundo ongoing series.
It's funny,at work on the grind to make a future, it feels like we are being exploited, long working hours, standing most part of the day if not all day, waking up early & what not, but that doesn't get to me like the guy.
We can't even meet half way on a drink or two because he doesn't drink...in my opinion he feels like he's better than the rest & his word or opinion is absolute. Atleast silver lining, the bar any bar, ( beers are like 100something in a good bar, he'll there's a place selling beers at 85bob Kenyan & its not even the barracks.)
I stray abit but the silver lining would be the bar is my total space, no chance of bumping into him or something ...I actually enjoy my own company & the relaxation that comes with it,loosing myself in thought, music & alcohol. Plus rugby, & the mates are usually universal and speak the same language of the game & alcohol.
Whoosh, I think I just summariesed a marriage, am I experiencing one without all the perks......dawn. talk about self realization.
Cheers blogosphere.  Have a good week.